Love story

Your Intuition and Romance

by: Heidi Richards

Using all Six Senses to Be More Romantic

�Knowing what your partner wants and needs is your sixth sense or intuition at work.� - Heidi Richards

Call it intuition. Call it ESP. We all have it and can use it to create a lasting romantic relationship. When our sixth sense is in full gear, it�s like one of those timeless moments between two people when nothing else in the world matters and no one else exists. I�m not talking sex, here. I am talking when two people connect on a level beyond the physical. Let me explain. I was married for 16 years to a good man; he was a good father and a good provider. In fact, we seldom had any conflict in our lives. For some women that might be enough. And yet something was missing from our relationship. He just didn�t �get� me. Even after 16+ years of marriage, he didn�t really know what I liked or what made me tick. It was inevitable that we would not stay together forever.

Then I met a man whom I have been with for nearly 14 years. It was like he knew instinctively what I liked without me even telling him. Rarely does a day goes by when one of us doesn�t call each other and talk about something the other was actually thinking or go to the store and buy dinner (just what the other was craving without verbalizing that craving). We tease one another about how keen our sixth sense is at certain times. I find it very romantic. I call it a connection to something more and greater than the physical senses are able to distinguish.

And how about the other five senses? How do we know just which senses we should focus on? If they work to create the kind of romance your partner appreciates, then I believe you have what it takes to increase the power of your sixth sense, far beyond touch, taste, sight, smell and sound. Here are some tips for using all six senses to be more romantic (excerpted from the book Romance on a Budget � www.romanceonabudget.net):

Sight

Look into my Eyes (#11) � When you gaze into each others eyes, everyone else seems to disappear. And looking intensely at one another can send a message to your partner that can lead to better things.

Sound

Listen � (#37) � Do you want to know a secret? Being a good listener is an art. Some people are natural good listeners, others need practice. When you truly listen to one another it demonstrates that you care about what they are saying. It�s most important communication skill in a successful long-term relationship. If you really want to know your partner�s likes and dislikes, wants and desires, perfect the art of listening.

Taste

Hungry for love (#120) � Visit a local fruit or vegetable grove together and pick your own. Take your goodies home and cook up something wonderful, then feed it to each other. MMMMMM� Good!

Smell

The scent of you (#46) Spray your perfume or cologne on the phone most often used by your partner. Or all the phones in the house. This will surely kick the romance meter up a few notches. It�s especially effective if you are going out of town.

Touch

Touch me in the morning (#115) � � in the afternoon, in the evening. Give your partner a massage. Buy some fragrant massage oils and watch the tension turn to pleasure. Take turns.

Intuition

A Hard Day�s Night (#30) � After a hard day�s work, surprise your partner by having a steaming hot bath ready and waiting. Light the bathroom with candles and yummy scents. After bathing and drying your partner off, show him/ her to your candle lit boudoir, where the bed is ready and waiting with satin sheets and rose petals and soft music is playing. This is where you will proceed to rub his/her body down with scented body massage oil. After working up an appetite, have a romantic dinner ready, waiting to be served.


Developing and using all six senses in romance can create a connection that goes deeper � to our souls. Knowing what your partner wants and needs is your sixth sense or intuition at work. When you develop your sixth sense in romance you will instinctively know which of the other five to use when and in which combination to use them.

Finding Your Ideal Partner?

by: Rick Valens

How would you describe the ideal girl of your dream?

�Oh, she has got to be beautiful with a nice figure, having a sweet and sexy voice, cheerful, gentle, considerate, kind-hearted, understanding, independent, musically inclined, share a common interest of mine, hmm� knows how to prepare nice food and� �

Ok, that is enough. Now, do you think such a perfect person actually exists? Well maybe yes maybe not. But if everyone were to nevertheless, really have such a high expectations, love is certainly going to be hardly visible in the air. Don�t you think so too?

So, what makes an ideal partner then? Well before we go on, perhaps it might be good to know what an exact ideal partner are we discussing here? A dating partner or a marriage partner? Or has this question never even occurred to you before?

Ok, let us answer the question again separately. Hmm� maybe we shall get the girls to answer this time.

First question: How would you describe an ideal dating partner?

Common answers would include, �Dashing with a nice body, full of gentlemanliness, caring and considerate, having a good sense of humor, cheerful, fun loving, adventurous, full of fun and excitement, loves me dearly and etc�

Ok now the second question: How would you describe an ideal marriage partner?

Common answers would include, �Mature, got a sense of responsibility, cheerful, caring, understanding, honest, kind-hearted, having a financially stable income, knowledgeable, able to take good care of the family, loves me dearly and etc�

Notice the difference? An ideal dating partner and an ideal marriage partner is usually a very different person, perhaps just very a little in common I would say.

Well in a perfect case, an ideal partner should of course be best, both a dating and a marriage partner. Someone whom you enjoy dating, bringing you lots of fun, joy and excitements; at the same time someone whom is willing to share your problems and unhappiness, accepting all your negative habits and faults; committed to bringing you happiness.

But again, does such an ideal person exist? Can we really have both the pie and the cake? Think about it. Are we somehow setting too high an expectation? Unknowingly rejecting our chances? Losing the opportunity to be in love? Unknowingly bringing unhappiness to your relationship, yourself and your love? Hmm� well, do remember that we are afterall just talking about ideal here. Something, which is good to have, but not a must to have?

So before you are going to start complaining again that life is so unfair to you, ask yourself, �Have you really ever tried? Tried pursuing for happiness?�

Instead of always picking on your partner�s faults making life unhappy for both, have you tried looking at the other beautiful side of them, their beautiful qualities? Appreciating what you have already got? Tried improving on yourself instead, to becoming a better lover; a more ideal lover? Willing to open up yourself, giving both yourself and others a chance? Remember, what you expect of yours or your future partner is equally what he or she expects of you.

Going into a relationship is never a game. It is a long-term investment, an investment of love between the both of you. It is something which both have to genuinely think through and plan far. What would actually come after dating? Marriage is what I should suppose? Sharing the rest of your life, your future happiness with that special someone?

Well, if nothing were to go wrong in your relationship, your dating partner is eventually going to become your marriage partner, your life partner. Can I say so? Ok, to the girls, let me ask you a question. Would you share your happiness with someone that is full of fun and excitement to be with now, but deep down within yourself you know he is not going to be a good husband, someone who would not take good care of his family?

So again, what is your definition of an ideal partner? Someone whom truly love you, willing to share your problems and unhappiness or? Well, the answer is within you. It has been with you all this while, only you can find the answer to this question. Your happiness belongs to you, nobody can decide for you. Be true to yourself, you should know what you really wants.

To Love or Not to Love?

by: Rick Valens

Have you ever fallen in love with two different persons at the same time? Falling in love with two different persons whom both have the same feeling for you too? Well, there is actually nothing wrong with that. In fact I would say that it is something very normal, sometimes even falling for more than two persons for some.

We are afterall human beings, creatures of great emotions. It is just natural for one to develop a liking for the opposite sex, especially when the both are getting along very well. Sometimes, it is just so hard for us to control our feeling and nevertheless, it has always been human nature to be greedy. It is always good to be able to have the best of both worlds isn�t it? But well, things are usually just not possible. At the end of the day, you just have to make your choice, to decide for yourself, your one and only love whom that person to be.

To love or not to love, it is your choice. Think of it this way. In our path of life, we are always faced with choices. Choices that we have to make decisions over; decisions that will affect our life. At circumstances, even having to make immediate decision on the spot, decisions concerning of life and death. Sometimes we made the right decision and sometimes the wrong. But no matter what our decisions might have brought so far; we accepted them, didn�t we?

That is life. There is not way the world is going to stop moving just for you. To turn left or to turn right, to move forward or to turn back, you just have to make up your mind. I should believe that you will not choose to be stuck at the cross junction for your whole life?

Well, a game of chances and uncertainties life has nevertheless always been. If you never play you can never win. You have just got to make your choice, to decide where to place your bet. You can of course choose to give up, not to risk your bet. You always have your choice. Life is just so full of choices, remember? But well, will you later regret giving up that chance when you have it?

The same goes for love. Between the both, you just got to decide whom you really like more. Well, having choices is always better than not having any at all, right?
I should also believe that you are not going to give up that chance of even placing your bet? I know it is going to be hard but do just give yourself sometime. Follow where your heart goes. Between the both, there is definitely one whom you will actually like more.

Ok, just picture this scenario; there are this two musical concert, both a once in a lifetime concert. Missing it, you will never get the chance to see it again. You have been dying to catch the shows all these while. However for such a coincidence, they are been held at the same timing on the same day. Again, I suppose you will not just give up the chance of catching both shows altogether? Between the two, you will definitely choose one right?

Finally, to get to fully enjoy the show, which you had decided upon, you just got to forget about that disappointment from missing the other show. But well, more often than not, once you found yourself in the musical concert, chances are you will be totally captured by that spectacular ambience, enjoying yourself so much, totally forgotten about any disappointment that you earlier had.

Now where we are discussing about love, it is just the same. Many at times, we just can�t bear to give up on what we already have, struggling so hard within ourselves. In the end, we might jollywell end up with nothing at all. In life, we gain some we lose some. It�s no use holding on so hard to something, which you know will not come out with anything. When you have to give up, you have to. When you have to choose, you just have to.

Just like choosing between the two musical concerts, follow where your heart goes. Once you made up your mind, everything will just seem so much clearer. Slowly, your path of love will reveal its way for you. Will it lead to happiness for you? Well again, we wouldn�t know. But if we never try we will never know. At least, I should believe that you will be much happier than to be still stuck at the cross junction, lost for direction?

Remember, the world is not going to stop turning just for you. So is with love. The two persons will not just keep waiting for you. Wishy-washy? You might just end up with nothing at all.

SOUL SHOCK - The real soulmate phenomenon

by: Steve Gunn


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An excerpt from his new eBook about Soul Mates 'When Two Souls Connect' }

'The human heart feels things the eyes cannot see, and knows what the mind cannot understand.' -Robert Vallett

If you've met someone who's changed you forever

If you love someone so much you realize you just weren't alive before them

If you've met someone who's awakened you to the unbelievable beauty of existence

If you've met someone who is more you than even you are

If you miss someone so much you can't even conceive of existing without them

If you've lost someone and it feels like your soul left with them then read on�

Typical of many cases I deal with is the story of Fiona and Robert.

I first met Fiona when she booked a telephone reading and I realized she was suffering a great deal of pain and confusion from the recent breakup of her relationship with Robert. I recommended she seek healing and, a week later, she arrived at my door.

I wish I had a cent for every tear that has been shed on that end of my sofa -- it's a wonder it isn't afloat by now. Seeing people in complete despair is a common occurrence for me but it never gets any easier watching someone fall apart, not least because I've been there. Some days, you just wonder what the human race is coming to when people can hurt others in the way this girl was hurting. However, she was here now and I was going to help her.

Her total devastation and confusion was apparent and, as I read both her energies and Robert's, I realized this was a very strong metaphysical ( soul mate ) connection, hence the level of suffering she was enduring. She told me her story, described what seemed an ideal relationship - until, in the midst of it, Robert had turned tail and run without warning. To add to her grief and despair, within a week he had hooked up with someone else and told her he wasn't coming back.

As in most of these cases, by tuning into him I knew he was in love with her. Fiona, however, was in no position to believe this, not based on his actions. It was totally clear to me, however, that the bond between them was strong and had grown ever stronger and stronger whilst they were together, to the point that it scared the hell out of Robert.

How do you tell someone that a person they love has hurt them because they love them too much? How do you explain that the 'runner' fears the intensity of the connection? I could tell this other woman meant nothing to Robert and was just a shoulder for him to cry on. But, to Fiona, it seemed he had been a cheater and had callously lied about loving her. That's a very natural assumption when someone you trust totally turns a one eighty and goes off with someone else without warning.

For those of us who are emotionally and spiritually open to love on any level, the idea of someone running from happiness is bizarre and cruel in the extreme. Fiona was struggling to make sense of it and wasn't winning at all, which added to her immense grief.

As I began her healing and looked at what had happened to her energies, I realized she was suffering from what I call 'soul shock.' When someone you have a deep connection with suddenly pulls away, the dis-connect leaves you feeling as if your soul has left your body, like an empty shell. You just can't get back to reality and you can feel as if you simply exist.

This experience is similar to grieving the death of a loved one and I know many counselors, at least those who accept and understand connections, who will treat this pain in the same way as a bereavement

. What we're talking about here is not a conventional emotional relationship. A soul connection is the most powerful soul level connection with someone and when separations like this occur you just can't "get over it" or "move on" however hard you try. Many people can't eat sleep or work for a long time, a lot end up on medication and in counseling.

Even after more cases than I can remember, it never fails to amaze me how powerful healing is and what a perfect tool it can be for dealing with soul mate connections. I pulled Robert's energy away from Fiona's so that she wasn't being tugged around like a leaf in a gale by his confusion. This process forced out some of her grief.

Unexpressed emotions are debilitating and dangerous, so I opened up her heart chakra and used a technique I call 'accelerated bereavement.' This acceleration brings out the despair and pain in a burst of crying that's so deep you know it's from the soul. But, after twenty minutes or so, this incredible pain eases and the subject calms. That's exactly what happened with Fiona.

What is unique about soul connections is that we feel our partner's grief and confusion and they feel ours. This creates a tsunami of pain as the energy flows across our spiritual link and bounces each of us around like two corks on a string. Putting a block in a place eases 'soul shock' tremendously, so that's what I did to allow Fiona a chance to get on her feet again.

As the weeks and months went by, I saw her and treated her on a regular basis. Throughout that time, she grew slowly but progressively stronger, even as she continued to ache badly from the pain of separation from Robert. When you are separated from a soul mate, you miss your partner every minute of the day and most days are nothing more than a torture of aching and needing. The soul mate connection is unlike a conventional relationship for, in these cases, the pain of separation doesn't lessen. Some days it feels as if your heart will burst out of your chest and fly to your true partner.

Fiona experienced all of this and more, although with readings and healing I was able to reduce the worst of the excesses and keep up her hope that the situation would resolve itself and Robert would come back. At times, she would call in total pain and disbelief and ask how anything could hurt so much and why couldn't she just get over him? As always, I explained that a connection so strong was something we have little control over and, in time, he would return. While we wait, all we can do is stay strong and accept what has happened. Trying to understand why just adds to the torture.

In time, Robert did contact her. Fiona, however, found it very difficult to talk to him. He frequently contradicted himself and didn't seem to have a clue what he was doing, how he felt or what he wanted. This, of course, made it much harder for her to be in contact with the man she loved so much, as she still struggled to make sense of why he had run in the first place.

This is a very common albeit totally bizarre and bewildering phase that nearly always occurs in these relationships. While the more aware soul feels the immense sense of pain and loss, the 'runner,' who mostly has a ton of issues, is absolutely confused by the power of the connection and will seem to contradict themselves and not know quite what's going on. It's common to hear 'I love you,' then a week later, 'I don't love you,' and a host of other seemingly weird behaviors.

Understand, however, that this is your soul partner struggling to understand what's going on within them, as they are also totally overwhelmed by the feelings and confusion that the connection brings.

At this point, I asked Fiona to trust me and to follow some simple rules for communication. She agreed when she realized the present interaction was confusing her even more. I asked Fiona to set out what she wanted from Robert, make it clear to him, then to back away. To insist that, if and when he called, she didn't want to hear how bad his life was, especially after she had offered everything to make him happy. And that if he could not be there for her, then to put the phone down.

Staying strong in this phase takes an awful lot of guts and faith when your runner seems so close to returning. To push them away unless certain criteria are met is scary when you so fear losing them again. But Fiona did it� And, as in most cases, after a while it worked. It's said that runners return properly when the pain of separation is greater than the fear of commitment.

And by refusing to negotiate on anything other than coming together properly, Fiona made Robert realize he had to face this once and for all or lose her.

They met, they talked, she called me. Robert had accepted he couldn't go on as he had and he was prepared to face his fears and give it a go. Many more meetings occurred before Fiona was sure he was ready and knew that he would face his fear of commitment.

When finally they both came together again, and had put the past behind them, Fiona asked Robert to come to me for a reading and consultation. Seeing a runner is a rare opportunity for me, because when most reconciliations occur, my work is done.

Robert arrived and it was apparent he had no idea what to expect. I gave him a psychic reading and saw what was going on within him and how he had struggled to make sense of the past couple of years. What he said was a real eye opener for me, a rare chance to see how the incredible intensity of a soul connection can scare the daylights out of someone seemingly so strong and together.

He started talking about a time before Christmas when he realized just how deeply he felt for Fiona and, although he had always shunned commitment of any sort, he had decided to ask her to marry him. On his way to buy a ring, he talked to a friend about marriage and said he suddenly became very scared and unsure. He never did tell me what the friend said but whatever it was plugged deep into his fears. After that, instead of asking her to marry him, Robert told Fiona it was over and that he had found someone else.

If you're astounded reading this, so was I when I heard it. His thinking was that he couldn't go through with it and maybe he wasn't good enough for her.

What if he wasn't ready, what if it didn't work? All the other fear and insecurity-based questions rose up in him. His thinking was if she thought he had someone else, she could move on and not follow him.

When runners run, they really do run. Robert had demonstrated absolute mastery of the runner 180-degree speed turn. It was obvious that this man was unsure about himself - never mind what he could offer in a relationship. He made all his decisions from the head, not the heart. He mistakenly assumed Fiona could 'get over it.' It's one of the most frustrating things when runners make assumptions and don't give the other partner a chance. That's just what this one did.

However, now Robert was back and he was talking to me and that meant he wanted to understand what this was about and how he could deal with it. This was a terrific omen for the couple's future.

The outcome was that Robert did start to deal with his demons. His karmic lesson was to realize that he couldn't live life by purely mental decisions. He learnt that his heart wouldn't stay away and that fighting the connection only hurt them both and, ultimately, didn't work.

I now have an invitation to their wedding on my desk

Fiona and Robert's case is very typical and, to my mind, reinforces the same message - the heart always wins in the end.

Relationship Advice: Follow Your Gut!

by: Justin C Luyt

Relationship Advice: Follow Your Gut! Copyright � 2005 Justin C. Luyt The Spirit of Romance http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com When people seek relationship advice from a trusted friend or family member, it is most likely a waste of time, says relationship author Justin Luyt. "We ask for relationship advice often when we feel we do not have the answers to our relationship challenges," Luyt says. "We grasp for external wisdom, with the false belief that we do not know the answers, but if we are being authentic to ourselves, we have those answers." Luyt recently published The Spirit of Romance, a book that offers readers practical relationship advice and uses interactive planning tools to not just change thoughts, but feelings and behavior, too. Using the term "Spirit", Luyt defines the inner source people must acknowledge before looking honestly inside themselves instead of seeking relationship advice from others. "We know why we are where we are in the relationship," Luyt says, "but often avoid our own internal introspection. Spirit challenges us to grow and learn." He insists that by strengthening relationship with Spirit, people can truly grow and move past the challenges at hand. "When we ask for help from a friend, it is for an ear... not guidance," he summarizes. Throughout his book, Luyt offers a look at self-reflective relationship advice, all based on Spirit, which allows people to see others in their true light, as people filled with desires, dreams and vulnerabilities. Luyt writes people seek mutual personal and spiritual growth as the basis for any relationship. His ideas of Spirit inspire people too look within their core being to experience something they can understand and feel completely. This acceptance of Spirit negates the need for outside relationship advice when people can answer the crucial questions with knowledge from within. When a relationship changes form or course, people have it within their Spirit to redirect their energies from sensitivity and vulnerability to spiritual strength. This strength gives people the ability to become their own relationship advisors because they have gained the insight necessary to overcome false doubts. Luyt writes, "People are here to grow; and spiritual growth occurs in a space of love, not fear." Through his public speaking and counseling work, the South African native has developed the Accelerated Romance Coaching Program, a one-of-a-kind mentoring and coaching system for singles and couples. Various Fortune 500 companies have used his trans-continental engagingly fresh, out-of-the-box and into- reality approach for group seminars, training and coaching. His book, The Spirit of Romance, is available at: http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com --------------------------------------------------------------------- Justin Luyt has been doing Coaching and Consulting for over 12 years. He is the published author of "The Spirit of Romance" and facilitates numerous seminars. To contact him call 1-877-7ROMANCE begin_of_the_skype_highlighting              1-877-7ROMANCE      end_of_the_skype_highlighting and his book is available at: http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com

Justin Luyt has been doing Coaching and Consulting for over 12 years. He is the published author of "The Spirit of Romance" and facilitates numerous seminars. To contact him call 1-877-7ROMANCE begin_of_the_skype_highlighting              1-877-7ROMANCE      end_of_the_skype_highlighting and his book is available at: http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com Contact him at http://www.SpiritOfRomance.com